Illuminati is Sexy Bill Cipher x Reader
by Fandom Police
Summary: What happens when you finally come out as being trisexual! (Attracted to triangles) Find out in Bill is illuminati XD -Toby


Hello, my name is _ and I am here to tell you about the most interesting experience of my life. His name is bill. Most girls are attracted to males or other girls but I have a special problem, I am trisexual. This simply means I am only attracted to triangles. I enjoy looking at pictures of illuminati because I will never find a real triangle. This brings depression on me. I cannot live my life without finding true love, but my true love doesn't exist….or so I thought. My best friend's name was Tward. Tward was friends with a random lady named Soup; and that is that. Tward said he knew things about triangles. He said triangles were mostly found in gravity falls. I wanted to go to gravity falls so I could lick triangles. I wondered how they felt inside me. Did they feel good? Did they bring pleasure? The curiosity drove me to insanity, and Tward had to drive me to gravity falls. He told me to go stay with a man named Stanford Pines. He was very fluffy and I liked to pet him. I asked him where the triangles were, and he said,

"I will give you the triangles only if you pay…."

"What I must I pay?"

"You must lick my grandchild, his name is Dipper"

"Ok, as long as he is triangular in some places"

"Uh…you can figure that out for yourself."

"Ok! I will run to him now!"

But as I ran upstairs, I tripped.

"Oh no!" I exclaimed. My triangle shirt ripped. I wanted Doritos more than anything.

"I am so sad!" I exclaimed again. I wanted triangles triangles, TRIANGLES!

After I screamed for five minutes and everyone in the mystery shack killed me multiple times, a strange blue portal appeared in the sky. It was triangular. I screamed. My fantasies were coming true.

"Shut up! I can hear you very well!" Said Stanford. I ran up to the triangle and tried to lick it, but then it fell, and I started to cry.

"No…all my hopes and dreams are dead because it died" But then, it rose.

"Hello there." It spoke. "I am Bill Cipher" OMG MY OWN TALKING TRIANGLE. I gizzed a little bit in my pants, and in my nose.

"You are sexy!" I said, bowing down to him"

"Are you trisexual?" He asked.

"How did you know?" I screamed.

"I know everything….I know you…and you, my friend, are sexy" MUAALALALALALALALLALALAL

I blushed and got a women boner. I felt surge through me. MMMMMM

"I think I have troner, which is a triangle boner, from looking at you" Bill said.

I wanted him. His sexy triangular form, his dark mysterious aura. He turned the sky black.

"I want you…." He whispered.

"I want you to" I whispered

He made noises. I opened the door he made, and we were greeted with a bed.

"OOOH I Like where this is going. MULALALALALALALAL" I said.

He pinned down on the bed and started attempting to kiss me but he didn't have a mouth, so he used his bowtie. The fibers on the fabric brushed my face. It felt amazing. I took his hat off because he didn't have any other clothes.

"You are everything I've dreamed of…he said, huskily aslfjaklsfjkasdfjlkafklasdjfkl.

"I want more of you" I said.

"The illuminati is confirmed sakjfklasjfklasfdklasdfjlkdsflkadjfkaskdlfjsfkdlfaj;sa"

He ripped off my clothes, and we was nakkid. I took off his bowtie.

"Heehee you nakey" I giggled. Bill blushed. He was so sexy when he was embarrassed.  
"I want you inside me" I said.

"Okay…" He said, derpily.

He slowly edged his point up my tube. I screamed. The sharpness was tearing me apart. The pleasure was overwhelming.  
"More! MORE!" I screamed, he kept thrusting harder and harder. Nothing happened though, because I was a human, and he was a triangle. BUT I LOVE HIM!Bill and I started to cry, realizing that we would never be able to be together. I had a secret. I was retarded. I was not trisexual. I was just stupid. I didn't love him after all. I cried. He hugged me. I pushed him away and ran out of the door with no clothes on.

"I AM GOING TO GET MY FRONTAL LOBE REMOVED!" I yelled.

"Ok….I never liked you" said Bill, and then he proceeded to bang Tward. I cried as I watched this happen. I didn't understand. WHYYYYYYYYYyyYYyYYYyyyyyYYYyYYYYyYYyyyyyYYYY. TRoooOOOoooooOOOoooOOooOoOoOoOOOoOoooll

The end.


End file.
